A Journey into Non-Alcholic Beers

IntroPart 1Part 2Part 3

In the middle of everything else that was going on in 2020, I went on some meds that meant I would have to be dry for a few weeks.

Considering all things, it seemed like a long time.

So I decided to grab a six pack of O’Doul’s and sit outside and pretend like everything was fine.

What I found was… it was fine? Like for the afternoon I-was-probably-going-to-have-a-light-pilsner-anyway beer, it was fine. In fact, it was just what I was looking for, AND fewer calories.

And I could have one or two on a Tuesday night and not worry about Wednesday morning. I could have a few at a party and still drive home. If I’d had a real beer or two at dinner, an NA beer let me have one more to stay and visit and not worry.

Fewer calories, less worry, what else do you need?

Oh right. Taste.

But that’s the thing, I found that too. Especially when I stopped looking for beer that tasted like X, and appreciated the NA beer for itself.

I haven’t gone dry, but have added NA Beers to my personal menu, enjoying them for both what they are, and the extra freedom they give me when I enjoy them.

We’ll start with the easy to find stuff, and follow on with more craft beers in a bit. I made a list of the beers I’d had as I was writing this and was happy to see how long it was. The days of two NA beer choices are behind us.

Warnings about NA vs Zero Alcohol

There are, in general, two kinds of NA beers. Non-Alcoholic and Zero Alcoholic. Non- means that the percentage is %0.5 or less. So if for any reason you cannot have any alcohol, these are not for you, as they still may have trace amounts.

Zero alcohol beers (%0.0) are just that, completely free. For some of us this is an important distinction, so I wanted to call it out. I will do my best to label things, but always read the labels of what you are buying to be sure.

O’Doul’s (<%0.5)

Let’s start with the king of NA beers

You may think of O’Doul’s and NA Budweiser, but they taste different. O’Doul’s is smoother and a little sweeter.

It is easy to find, it fills the roll of other American lager/pilsners, and tastes just fine. O’Doul’s is probably my most common NA purchase.

O’Doul’s Amber (<%0.5)

O’Doules has a second version, their Amber, which is also a tasty light beer. Think Killian’s, rather than Dos Equis.

A little harder to find than the original version, I still grab it when I can.

Coors Edge (<%0.5)

While O’Doul’s is the one I get the most, this one is probably my favorite of this style of beer. The Coors has a crisper taste. Recommend giving this one a try, especially if you have an issue with the sweetness of O’Doul’s.

Bud Zero (0.0)

Showing up shortly after I started down this path, Budweiser Zero is a 0.0 version of Bud. It is more bitter than the O’Doul’s, which some may prefer. In the end, tho, I’ll grab O’Doul’s first.

Lagunitas IPNA

I lovingly refer to this as the IP Nay, which is probably funnier in my head. But say it aloud just in case (NAAAAAY!). This was my first step away from the standard American style beer. Lagunitas’s IPA is a good IPA for those who like the lighter side of the hops. (Like me!) And the IPNA brings that taste with it. Link

Heineken 0.0 (0.0)

The only issue I have with Heineken 0.0 is that it tastes like a Heineken. Quips aside, they should be commended for the faithfulness. If you like Heinekens, this 0.0 beer is for you. link

Kaliber (<%0.5)

This is a NA Pils brewed by Guinness. It has a bolder flavor than most of the others on this list, pushing closer in flavor to a Harp than the American style pils. I quite enjoy it.

Buckler’s (<%0.5)

I was introduced to this one because it was the NA beer my local pub carried. Like Caliber, it is bolder, more flavorful than the standard faire.

Guiness 0 (<%0.5)

(Despite the name, this is NOT a 0.0 beer)

Finding this was an epic quest. I had heard Guinness had a NA beer, but had assumed after my searches the rumors were about Kaliber… Until I started getting ads for this. It was not easy to find, despite the numerous places around that sell normal Guinness, I had to travel over an hour away to get it.

And.

It tastes like Guinness. To be specific it tastes like Guinness in a can. The cans have the nitro bubble in that pops when you open, the beer is smooth and creamy as you’d expect it to be.

I don’t know why this is so hard to find, and I hope that changes.

Santa Clausthaler Christmas

I’m going to end this one with this amazing thing. Those weeks on meds was going to cross through the holiday season, and while Pumpkin beers are still my favorite, a Christmas beer helps in the dark of winter.

One day in the store a red six pack called Santa Clausthaler showed up, and so I thought what the hell.

It was delicious.

Cinnamon and spice, it tasted like Christmas candles smelled.

I didn’t see any for sale in 2021, but hopefully there will be more this year.

Clasusthaler is a NA brewer with other selections as well. Link

Next time

I’ll start on the craft NA beers I’ve found, which is pleasantly a growing list.

The Current State of WordPress is Confusion

I’ll start by saying I’ve been using WordPress as a major foundation for my websites since January 2008. I have made themes, plugins, and built several sites using the software.

I am not sure who WordPress is for anymore.

I’ve been helping my father with a WordPress site. He wants to set up a blog for some travel he’s got planned and wanted some help. Now my dad has used WordPress before, circa 2014, and went into this thinking it would be just some refresher tips.

It was not.

In fact, thanks to the new editor feature, it turned into me learning on the spot how to do things in the new set up.

Things that were at once simple, like setting up a menu or changing the widgets are now completely unintuitive, involving extra clicks, hidden menus, and figuring out which blue box is highlighted.

I pulled up my self hosted version (Dad is on WordPress.com), and most of those features are as I Ieft them, leading me to think the back end is 1. different on .com and 2. linked to the capabilities of the theme being used.

(There is an extra menu layer on the .com site that is nothing but frustration.)

It doesn’t change the fact that Dad just wants a blog to post updates and pictures, something WordPress was designed to do, and it is not a straightforward thing to set up anymore.

One thing we would always ask as we were designing websites is “is it clear what you want the user to do?” A question on my mind as I was explain my father how to simply write a post.

Even the app has nothing but clutter. Why isn’t “post a blog” the most prominent thing on the first screen? (Blue button in the corner)

What is the current focus of WordPress? Who are they looking for as users? I know they are going after places like Squarespace for the website/webstore builders, but who are they leaving behind?

I know in the year 2021 someone making a blog isn’t as common of a thing. And the sites that WordPress hosts are rapidly becoming either webstores or content for clicks sites and adds, but still.

Still.

Somewhere in the rush to add in unlimited options the most important part was forgotten: the user.

All Good Things…

Ten years is a good run for sure. It wasn’t the run I had hoped, but it still had lots of high points. And for LampLight, June 2022, which is its ten year mark, will be its last issue. This was not a decision made in haste, but one planned for nearly two years at this point.

LampLight never found the audience I was aiming for. Subscription numbers never grew above 100, much less to sustaining levels.

And I have reached a level of burnout that will only hurt future issues.

Getting help is never as easy as it sounds, and I will admit I am in envy of the magazines with staff and volunteers.

I am grateful for everyone who helped. To Cat, Paul and Elise who stepped in to edit, to Paula who helped with the masthead and first sets of covers. To Fiona who wrote amazing academic work on dark fiction. To Kevin whose answer “…yeah, I think I can write a novella…” started off the first volume of the magazine. To Ben, who helped me learn as much as I taught. To Jesus who believed in my unformed ideas and gave advice and guidance. And to Katie, especially, without whom the magazine would have never made it past a few issues.

I am proud of what was accomplished these past ten years. Just look at this list of authors.

The pages of this magazine hold some of the best fiction I’ve ever read. And yes, as the editor I am supposed to think that, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t true.

LampLight has had an amazing run, but it is time for other projects, other adventures.

I have no doubt LampLight will return one day. But for now, for a long while, it will sit, an archive of 40 issues of amazing dark fiction.

Apokrupha Books isn’t going anywhere. We will have classics and anthologies and more things coming in the months and years ahead.

My final advice to everyone is this: promote new releases from the magazines you want to see stick around with the same level of energy you promote their submission guidelines. A submission is not support, it is a business transaction. Support is promotion, purchase and reading.